A feeling of being stuck happens to all of us at some time in life – be it in our career or other aspects of life.

I started my coaching with a sense of being stuck in my current job and life in general. Gowri provided me with several guiding frameworks and a series of incisive questions that “forced” me to find time and focus to answer them. This helped me break the cycle, embrace the limits of my knowledge, and replace my overthinking and lack of confidence with bias for action. I made a few major leaps in the past six months, and I feel better equipped for future challenges.

The above comment from a client, who grew wings and liberated themselves from self-limiting thoughts and beliefs after a coaching partnership is heartwarming!

So, why does one feel stuck at work?

There can be many external, visible factors like:

• Not growing or stagnating (work content, pay, designation) can lead to a sense of being stuck
• Limiting Opportunities: Unable to showcase one’s strengths or interests or not getting support for one’s ideas
• Limited Opportunities: Few options to change or evolve within workplace
• Fear of Change: Uncertainty or fear about making a career change
• External Factors: Economic conditions, company instability, or industry changes

There can, however, be internal factors based on your beliefs, state of mind and attitude that can exacerbate the sense of stuck-ness:

–         when you lose sight of your strengths and the value you bring to the organization; e.g., I don’t think what I do is important to the organization.

–         feeling of guilt or shame on not having all the answers; e.g., I should know the answers to help the team keep moving forward.

–         when you are unable to make choices waiting for the perfect moment or opportunity and overthinking decisions; e.g., for everything I know, there’s more I don’t know, so how do I decide

–         when you start seeing even positive from a negative perspective; e.g., I am being given work that nobody wants to do or I am not good enough to get meaningful work

It becomes impossible to work on external factors unless you deal with the internal chatter to get over what is holding you back.

Reframing the beliefs can have a huge impact on changing the state of mind and hence enable working on the external factors:

–         Every choice made is for all eternity! No, choices can be corrected or refined as more information becomes available

–         Making a wrong decision can lead to irreversible costs!  Be comfortable with the imperfections, make progress on the information available Have the confidence that you can deal with what emerges

–         A person with one watch knows the time, a person with two watches is never sure! Simplify decisions by eliminating options that don’t matter.

–         The work I do, while it may not be shiny, is critical without which others’ pieces can’t progress! Recognize and understand where the work you do fits in the big picture!

This client was able to reflect inwards, recognize and name the blockers with honesty and courage to be able to make major transformational decisions regarding his work, personal life and create new possibilities for themselves.

What are some of the blockers you have encountered? Do share your experience in Comments.

This was first published on LinkedIn.

Executive coaching or leadership coaching is a growing field in India, though it is quite common in the Western world.

A lot of mid-senior leaders hesitate to consider engaging a coach for several reasons, some cultural and some due to lack of information and understanding.

So, why should you consider engaging with an effective executive coach and what should you expect as outcomes for yourself, your colleagues, and your families – Yes, as we all know, whether we like it or not, for most of us, how we feel after a workday impacts our families and loved ones!

I’m outlining the top 5 tangible results you can expect from an executive coaching partnership with the right executive coach:

1.    Know Yourself Better: To relate to others better, we have to know ourselves well – including what perceptions we have about ourselves and how others see us, our beliefs and biases, what triggers our unwanted behaviors, and behaviors we want to continue with and other self-limiting internal conversations inhibit us from being the best we can be! An executive coach holds a mirror and acts as an objective witness who makes it easier for you to identify your real strengths, blind spots and triggers that end up controlling us subconsciously.

2.    Know Others Better: As you work with a skilled coach, peeling off the biases and beliefs through which we assess and judge others we interact with, our understanding of others in our professional and personal circles becomes more objective and less judgmental. A good leadership coach will also help you focus on the strengths of others so that you can lead and get the best out of individuals you work and collaborate.

3.    Learn to Manage Our Reactions Better: so that we respond and not react to the triggers in our environment. Marshall Goldsmith’s recent book Triggers he talks about triggers that we react to in ways that we’d not like to, and triggers that stop us from getting better through behavioral change that is needed as we grow and take on different and tougher challenges at work. An insightful coach will help you discover these triggers and recognize when they occur in our day-to-day interactions and manage your response better!

4.    Know and Leverage Your Strengths Better: A lot of us are our own worst critics and we don’t celebrate our strengths and accomplishments enough. E.g., a leader who can see pitfalls and potential risks earlier than others can sometimes be seen as someone with a negative approach rather than seeing it as a strength – and over time the leader can herself begin to believe it and hold herself back from contributing. A good executive coach can help you discover, acknowledge and be able to use your strengths in a positive manner.

5.    Achieve Your True Potential and Get the Results You Want: An effective leadership coach can be an objective, neutral partner who has no personal agenda other than making you successful. The coach can be more honest than your employees, friends and families and challenge you to deal with actions and beliefs that hold you back and make you see yourself, your environment and triggers that impact your effectiveness. The coach can support you to find the right goals and stay disciplined and focused to achieve the goals.

Effective coaches also help lay out a personalized action plan customized to your specific requirements and monitor your progress. They also help you stay focused and steer you back toward your goals.

Trying anything new can be scary and hard to sustain discipline throughout the process. However, if you have the courage and commitment to evolve and grow, a coaching partnership can be one of the best things to achieve your goals and become who you are meant to be!

This was first published on LinkedIn